Sept. 15th, 2003
Star
light, star bright
The first star I see tonight
I wish I may, I wish I might
Have the dish I dish tonight
Let's dish shall we?
Where do we start? Hmmm…is it check out time at Paradise Hotel?
Paradise Hotel nearing completion
Fox's trashy summer reality show that features eleven singles living together
in an exclusive resort where they must hook up or check out is nearing
completion. This show is pure dirt. Just bottom of the melodrama schmaltzy
barrel. But clearly I am hooked. I don't know why but I have a soft spot
for trashy reality shows. Don't worry, I am going to therapy. But I digress.
The concept of the show is somewhat of a cross between Big Brother and
Temptation Island, people hooking up but also trying to live with one
another and attempting to not get eliminated. Simple enough. Still with
me? However, as we approach the conclusion of this TV series and thus
the game there is still one question that remains. What the hell are the
contestants playing for? What is the bounty? The host every week vaguely
dances around this by saying "two players will win the ultimate prize".
Okay, sounds…ultimate….but, what is it? Are they getting cash,
a trip, do they win the hotel, do they have to marry their partner? What
is the bloody prize? Come on, throw me a frickin' bone here. Perhaps they
simply get the Paradise Hotel home game and a lifetime supply of Rice
a Roni? I have a feeling the producers of the show don't yet know what
the prize is so that is why they are avoiding the issue. Maybe they are
waiting to see how much advertising revenue they get before the finale?
"Congratulations lovebirds you have won…umm…$17,356!"
Meg Ryan sheds nice girl
image and clothes
For her new role in the film "In The Cut", Meg Ryan was required
to do a few nude scenes. Way to get edgy Meg, but too bad this was about
ten years too late. Ewww…are those socks with tennis balls in them?
Harrison Ford would love
bad guy role
What do you mean Harrison? You've treated us to a number of bad roles
recently including the shitty sergeant in Random Hearts, or the shitty
Russian sub commander in K-19: The Widowmaker or the shitty cop in Hollywood
Homicide. Ohhhh you said bad GUY roles. Whoops, my mistake.
The Mullets debuts on UPN
A show about two misunderstood white trash dudes with mullets (Get it…ya
see the boys have mullets, that's why we gone done named the show the
Mullets!) who live with their mother (played by Loni Anderson) and their
new stuffy step father (played by Seinfeld's Mr. Peterman, John O'Hurley).
What's that expression? Anything Loni Anderson touches turns to gold?
UPN does it again!
Bennifer postpones their
wedding
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo….the humanity. When will
J'lo and Ben Affleck finally tie the knot? The suspense is killing me.
When is the new date Bennifer? Is love still in the air Bennifer? You
aren't calling it off are you Bennifer? When you find your life seems
shallow and empty the perfect solution is to just say Bennifer over and
over again. Say it with me…Bennifer. Bennifer. Bennifer.
Zing! Take that Hollywood!
...but that's just my opinion.
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