Tales From The Line Up




	Tales From The Line Up
	Tales From The Line Up
		Having reached my late twenties now, I can safely say I have a keen understanding of the bar and club scene. Like many, I have my own perspectives on the overpriced alcohol, the bizarre mating rituals, the do's and don'ts on the dance floor, and washroom etiquette. However we need to be weary even before we enter these lairs of booze and debauchery. There is the issue of the bar line up. There seems to be an unnecessarily high amount of difficulty and attitude in what should be a simple procedure. Things need to change. Below is my list of the top three things that need to be remedied in the strange ordeal we call the nightclub line up: 1. The Line Up Strictly For Appearance Anyone who has ever frequented bars has stood in one of these lines at some point. You know these fabricated line ups that we are forced to stand in outside, while unbeknownst to us that the particular venue we wish to enter is completely empty. Now people will say that the reason they do this is to create the appearance that the bar is busy and happening. It's interesting to note that no other place of business does this. Restaurants don't create lines to make it look busy; if there is a table available you will be seated…what a concept. I have yet to know of a movie theatre that would sit people out front to try to make "On The Line" appear to be a popular film. Imagine creating a line up for a theme park ride. We won't actually run the roller coaster until we have a suitable enough line up to help create the image that the "Neckbreaker" is the ultimate thrill ride. And then and only then will we start running the ride. Bars and clubs are the only businesses that penalize patrons for showing up early. We are here, we have money, and we want to spend it. Let us in! We can see through the window that the only people in there are your bar staff. Don't these lineups eventually happen anyways…? Don't worry you will get your line ups. People who show up too late will be in a line. Isn't that good enough? 2. The Patronizing Door Man We have all met this fellow before once or twice. The guy wearing the headset, holding the clipboard, who can't make eye contact with any of us until he is checking our I.D. He refuses to give any straight answers, has no idea how to tell or predict time, and will card your grandfather. And the only time he speaks to you, it is in that condescending voice…you know that one? Ewwww. Okay…I understand this is your job. I understand you want to take your chosen profession seriously. But buddy, you are a bouncer standing out in front of The Ice House not St. Peter letting people into heaven. So can the attitude and let us in! 3. The House of Lies Many establishments utilize the guest list. A very simple procedure that involves people calling in advance to let the bar or club know that they will be arriving with a number of guests at a certain time. Upon arrival they are allowed access to the bar before those in line. (Very similar to the reservation process used at restaurants) I am fine with this. I am also fine with the fact that if I show up after the bar reaches a certain capacity I may have to wait in line. However what does bother me are the little lies or ambiguous answers given to us by the staff. Example #1- Q: Excuse me how long do you think the wait will be before we get in? A: Don't worry you will get in. Okay…the question was WHEN. If the bar has reached a certain capacity and there are still names on the guest list that are guaranteed entrance, then why not be honest and tell me and the other 50 people in line that the wait will likely be 2 hours. Is that too hard? The honesty would be refreshing. Equipped with this information I can either choose to stay or leave. Look at your watch and make a guess…is that too much to ask? Example #2- It's gonna be a bit of a wait, we are at capacity. I let anyone else in and we run the risk of getting charged. (enter three nice looking 25 year old girls stage left) …right this way ladies come on in! It's a 5 dollar cover charge tonight. Can we not even try to be honest? Don't throw around stories about capacity and then let some cheeseball hotties in the next moment. Gimme some truth. No one is coming in unless they are one of my old high school friends or a group of women much better looking then you. Even that would be better. The bar and club scene is confusing and pretentious enough without the further complications of just getting into them. Yes, if you frequent large bars or clubs enough you must be prepared that you will sometimes have to wait in lines. However, a little respect once and awhile would be nice for the people who are spending the money. We are the customers. More so, that respect should even be extended to potential customers. If you want customer loyalty, it should start at the front door. Having said that…if people keep showing up every Friday night and put up with it, maybe the real problem is with them. …but that's just my opinion. Do you Agree with what he's saying? Tell Us HERE or mail to:michael@boldopinion.com Click here to see more articles by this Author!