As cheesy as this show was, as a child I could never get enough of it. Arnold's burning down. Pinky Tuscadero. Leather Tuscadero. The Malachi crunch. Pure magic. Regardless of all the crazy hijinks that the Happy Days gang got themselves into, there was one character that was the culmination of all the ideals I hoped one day to aspire too. That was "The Fonz". Not to sound overly cliché, but "The Fonz" was the coolest. Black leather jacket. Cool hair. Rode a motorcycle. Mystical like powers over jukeboxes and other common household items. Snap his fingers and girls with poodle skirts would come running from every direction to be held in his arms. Man, this guy had it all. But in the later seasons "The Fonz" began to change. Richie had already left Milwaukee to fight communism in Greenland and "The Fonz" slowly began to lose his "cool". "The Fonz" stopped working in the garage and began teaching auto mechanics at Jefferson High. He would no longer seduce anonymous teenage girls at Arnold's and began a serious relationship with a single mother. In the final season, "The Fonz" actually adopted a son. What happened? Why had "The Fonz" given up the fantastic lifestyle he once knew? What scared me even more was thinking of what was going to happen next? PTA meetings? There was no way he could drive his son around on his motorcycle, so he would have to find another mode of transportation. Minivan? Erk! And if he wasn't driving his motorcycle around anymore he definitely wouldn't need his leather jacket. What would he wear instead? A cardigan sweater? Gasp! With all of these frightening thoughts floating around in my head I came to a chilling realization. If this could happen to "The Fonz" it could happen to me as well. Aigh!
When does this happen? I need to know. At what point does living the jet set lifestyle of a young urban individual begin to lose its appeal? When do I make that transition from wearing fashionable clothing to walking out of the house wearing shorts, black socks and sandals with a smile on my face? Can you tell me when I should be changing my radio presets from the modern rock stations to the local news and talk radio stations? Where the idea of staying out late on a weeknight is an incomprehensible notion. I look at my parents and I think to myself, at one point they were once like me. Living la vida loca, dancing, drinking and doing wild crazy things. They couldn't have been sitting at home reading five newspapers a day and watching The Antique Road Show all their lives. So when did it happen? For some reason I can't see myself at 50+ years old still reading comic books, playing video games, and watching Saturday morning cartoons. Realistically I'm pushing the envelope for these interests already. Should I be preparing myself for the future with other hobbies like building clipper ships in bottles or constructing elaborate model train landscapes? I'm scaring myself by worrying about these things now. I would hate to think what's going to happen when I go through my mid life crisis. I think my head's going to explode.
It's going to happen in stages. It's going to be a slow gradual process where the changes will be so subtle I won't even be able to notice them happening. Right now I can only concentrate on maintaining my "Fonz" like lifestyle and deal with the fact when I become Howard Cunningham when it happens. Ayyyyyy!
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