If there is one thing I've learned on my short time here on earth is that men are pretty stupid. Not all the time stupid in fact there are times when we as a gender can be quite smart. 'Well then what do you mean?' You might ask. 'How can we be stupid and smart at the same time?'

' Well what I mean', I say with the best intentions, 'is that men are pretty stupid when it comes to women.'

'Ahhhh' you all say as the realization comes to you. 'Yeah, we are pretty stupid.'

The stupidity doesn't come with the basic liking of women…that's smart. In fact that is why we're put on this planet. Instead of generalizing, I'll give an example of men's ability to not rationalize, more specifically, our infatuation with the strip club.

For some reason men seem to love going to strip clubs. Okay right of the bat, there is naked girls in dem dere places. Okay, I'm not making my point with that argument. Yes looking at naked women whilst enjoying a barley pop isn't the worst way to spend an evening. But from a man's perspective, we seem to like the attention paid to us by these women. We have yet to grasp the fact that these women only see us as a cash machine with a boner.

I am sure that there are guys in there who will believe the B.S. that is spewed out of the mouths of the girls that want to dance for you. Once I was actually told that I was the best looking guy this girl has ever seen. Okay stop laughing now. I know I don't have open, oozing sores on my face but, c'mon lady I have a mirror. How can you expect someone to believe that? After I signed over the deed to my house I couldn't understand how men fall for this. Sure it's a nice ego boost but really how can we go time and time again for this type of abuse?

Do men think that they really have a chance with these half naked con artists? The part I don't get is why not go to a regular bar and try to meet women that might actually see you for more than a paycheck. Sure women are way meaner there and you might have to actually learn to speak to them but that one time out of like 500 can make it all worthwhile. Picking up a stripper? You've got a better chance going home with that hot bartender…and we all know that ain't gonna happen.

Even the math isn't that hard.

Dance at a strip club: $20 a song
Dance at a regular club: Free

Beer at a strip club: $6
Beer at a regular club: $4.50 (depending on club)

Talking to a stripper: 2 drinks and a few dances
Talking to a girl at a regular club: Free…but don't ask her to dance for you.

Going home with a stripper: More than you make in a week.
Going home with a girl you met at a club: Priceless

I mean no disrespect to all the dancers out there, you're just doing your job…and a darn fine job at that. I know that these dancers are just girls and they do date just like everyone else. But from the perspective of a guy, just cause she was shakin' that ass 2 inches from your face doesn't mean she likes you…you just paid her to do that. It's her work.

Out of all of the places we can go to meet women this is probably your worst bet. I mean if you just want to see some boobies and have them smooshed in your face then by all means get in line. My concern here is the guys who go like 3 times a week and talk about the girls like they are potential girlfriends. "Yeah, you should have seen it. Misty was at our table for like 45 minutes." I guess if we're dumb enough to keep going then shame on us. Not that I haven't spent my share of time in these places, I'd just rather spend time with a girl who isn't going to ask me cash or credit at the end of the night.

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